jlutin: It's not the girl's fault now is it? :s
You were worried about it before. I am assuming you expressed that concern. It went down as you feared. You could see the problem, she missed it or ignored it. As I said, maybe nothing similar will never happen again, however, if she keeps putting herself in similar circumstance, you had best not ignore it.
well as i stated she didnt know he was going to be there, and neither did I. Had she known she would not have gone. I did warn her to be careful because he might try to do something. She said she would, and she was. Its not like she knowingly let him jump in bed with her, and when she realized what had happened she didnt jump back into bed. She always resisted his advances or brought it to light (even before we were dating when he would try to put his arm around her she'd say "um what are you doing? get your arm off me") You seem to not be giving her the benefit of the doubt, but that is because you do not know their backstory.
They are both from the same town and knew the same people but never really met until she came to college park. He developed a bit of a crush for her, though she never had feelings for him. He threw a party and she was a bit too drunk to drive. He offered his bed and that he would sleep on the couch. when she laid down to sleep, he jumped in bed with her and they talked alot. he then kissed her, she felt VERY awkward and pushed him off and told him she didn't like him like that. This occured 2 months before me and her ever met. He has sinced still tried to impress her or, like the example in the first paragraph, try to make a "move"a week before me and her started dating he dropped by and told her he was moving to college park and was going to attend college (mind you he is 27 and she is 20. he also has a kid with a girl but she broke up with him because he was a deadbeat). While he was visiting he was laying it on very thick with his flirting; laughing at not very funny jokes/anecdotes she told, trying to put his arm around her, and other things like that. All with in my presence. She did push back his advances but wrote it off as him not having many friends and was trying to be friendly (because she thought she set him straight months ago).
Once me and her started dating he was always a concern of mine. She had no intentions of ever doing anything with this guy and also felt he was very dumb and annoying at times (all do to him trying to impress her from what I saw). He would pop by every now and again to hang out with her and would try to when I wasn't around. A few times he would call asking to hang out and she would say "I can't I am doing homework, unless you want to come over and do homework too." but instead of bringing homework, he would bring beer. She wouldn't drink and it would just further the awkwardness and annoy her that she was trying to study and he would be trying to get her drunk. I made it clear that I didn't like or trust this guy. She views him as her only friend in college park, as all her other friends still reside in annapolis and never went to college. She did understand my concern but assured me nothing was going to happen. I trust her, I have no reason not to and I understand that she doesnt really have and friends in college park.
One day on my way home I had but dialed turning off my phone. She had thought I was mad at her and was ignoring her (it was an honest mistake, she had kicked me out of her room the night before because I couldnt stop snoring and she had an exam the next morning. I wasn't mad but she was worried I was). When I got off the bus I walked a friend home as we were in deep conversation. After I dropped my friend off at his place (not far away from my place) I pulled out my phone to see if she had texted me only to find out my phone was off. I turned it on and my phone blew up with texts from her thinking I was mad at her and playing mind games with her. All the while the dude just so happened to stop by and saw she was upset with me and asked her "why are you 2 even still dating!" as if our relationship was doom to fail at the start and trying to turn her against me. I called her and explained to her what had happened and that I was neither mad at her, nor playing mind games and that it was a total misunderstanding. She was no longer mad but when I arrived and saw him there I was not happy because I didnt want him over if she was mad at me. That night she told me what he said and I pointed out what his intentions where based on what he had said and his actions before hand. She said she would never hang out with him alone any more. She is trying to hold onto her 1 friend in town while appeasing me.
About a month ago or so she threw a party because she had successfully did the mile swim in the cheasapeak bay. She went to bed a bit early before her guests had left and I remained as host. The dude was still there and was not good enough to drive, but was not relinquishing his keys to me. So I got him more drunk to make him pass out and sleep it off (I out drank this pansy too by the way). I took care of his drunk ass despite the fact I hate this guy. I covered him with a blanket, talked him through trying to rest, and tried to get him to puke in the bucket (which he was refusing to do half the time). he went to the bathroom and fell, ripping the towel rack off the wall and bending the shower curtain which woke my girlfriend up. We both tried to take care of him and get him to puke in the bucket and not the floor! We finally sent him on his way. My girlfriend called him the next day and explained what he did and what i did. he denied doing anything despite the fact that I and her seen him do it. He finally came over and helped clean (and by help clean he showed up and sat on the couch). While I was out trying to get some carpet cleaner my girlfriend scolded him for being an asshole and "this is why I love my boyfriend, he is no fan of you but he still took care of you as if you were his brother, and you always seem to try to disrespect him every chance you get!" he has shaped up since. this recent road trip inccedent has destroyed their friendship because again he was disrespecting me, her, and oer stepping his boundaries, and on top of that he didnt apologize for doing it or making her uncomfortable!
It sounds to me like this Marley is no friend to you and that this Katie, at best, is an idiot, and probably is also trying to stir the pot between you this other guy and your girl friend. I still say solve this problem with an axe.... what can I say, it's genetic.
Marley I think tried to do the right thing but failed. katie on the other hand has always been a bit of a bitch and has always been aboutherself. One time she called up my girlfriend asking her to come to this rave that she was going to. my girlfriend said no because she had aleady had about 10 beers and was not good enough to drive. katie bitched and complained and insulted her into going. It was later revealed why katie made a big deal out of it, she needed a ride home. Seriously what a bitch!
