Empire Do's and Don'ts
A compilation of the bitter wisdom of the warhammer-empire forum, for the edification and intimidation of the new Empire player
-Written by the members of the forum, and loosely edited by Doofus Park Hire-
"...granted it isn't as retarded as having a lady popping out of your head holding a cup while humping a boar with a sword through its back, but there can only be one Brettonia." Philly T
What follows is a lengthy list of things to avoid and things to rush toward, when designing and playing an Empire army. These are not laws. These are not commandments. They may not even be true.
No one needs advice to decide what they consider fun. On the other hand, hearing from other players what is useful and powerful in game terms can be very helpful.
After all, taking an entirely random example, taking an engineer is fine if you aren't expecting much from him. Thus a list like this, provided the information in it is sound, helps to prevent disappointment!
Also, please note that the opinions expressed here do not reflect the views of warhammer-empire.com. Except when they do.
And so we begin:
Don't use Spearmen for detachments. Their key ability to fight in 2 ranks is wasted when counter-charging.
Do add Musicians to any unit that can take them. They help units to rally with our low Leadership, and win tied combats.
Don't use the Crystal Ball. Most items/upgrades become predictable with a little experience, and the usefulness of this item quickly degrades.
Don't field Halberdiers as parent units (seriously - no matter what certain deluded games designers say, Halberdiers are made out of suck). 8th Edition has changed this
but only field them in units of 40+
Don't field a master engineer, ever (they were so bad in the previous army book that they actually became more expensive in the newer one. Why? Ask a certain deluded games designer). 8th edition once again made them a viable option.
Don't add standards to anything but big infantry blocks and hammer units of knights. The risk of losing 100 victory points is just not worth it on a unit that can die easily.
Do field mounted heroes. The extra armour and ability to move fast is always worth it (except if you have armour of meteoric iron). Remember that you can still join infantry blocks, all though it will certainly look silly if you do.
Don't buy expensive magic weapons for your characters. A simple great weapon is often good enough and an empire character just isn't killy enough on his own for the weapons to be worth it.
Do use 'nilla knights (5 knights without command except a musician), but please don't call them that since it is a horrible name. They have many uses, everything from warmachine hunting to charging into the side of blocks to take away their rank bonus. They can also be easily sacrificed if necessary.
Don't use the war altar. It's too cheesy and boring (the one in the empire really does drive round a lot) and everyone uses it. Eh, just kidding but still, better be original.
If you take a Wizard, take the Rod Of Power. Nothing is better in the Magic Phase than converting unused Power/Dispel dice to weapons.
You need to take at least a single cannon, you will always to need to kill/scare big nasties like Monsters and Chariots.
Always do your best to limit the effects of Fear/Terror/Panic on your army. Use Detachments to limit Panic, the Imperial Banner and so forth.
Dont take a War Altar, two steam tanks and 4x cannons. It makes the rest of us look bad.
Don't take archers unless they are huntsmen or detachments (also, don't use huntsmen at all. A certain deluded games designer ruined them).
Don't EVER field 8x knights for any reason...
Don't use 5x man combat detachments. 3x3 is the way to go.
Do use the spell checker when posting on the forum.
Do not shoot a helblaster volleygun at skinks! In fact, don't use a helblaster at all (because of a certain deluded you know the rest).
Do field ranked up infantry, static combat resolution is the way to go.
Do field detachments, unless playing in an environment where everybody has a foolproof way of countering them.
Do use van Horstmann's Speculum. He made a lot of them.
Do read the psychology rules. Read them again. Now take care that your army suffers not too badly from them.
Do protect you flanks. It's not like we don't have the troops to do this.
Don't expect your characters to achieve wonders in close combat - except with the speculum (and even then, don't expect it).
Don't charge heavy cavalry head-on in a unit of ranked up infantry, unless the odds are really on your side.
Don't buy the Robot Horse, unless you want a visit from an angry Mr. Schwarzenegger.
Do sometimes field a general that is not an Arch Lector on a War Altar.
Do always mount your characters on Barded War Horses except the guy with AoMI.
Do take the Rod of Power always. Two dispel scrolls will dispel only two spells, the Rod of Power lasts the entire battle and allows you to go on the offensive when appropriate.
State Troops should always have five ranks.
Don't give a full command on a unit of 5 knights.
Don't worry if people laugh at your Halberdiers. Remember, combat resolution wins the battle. If they keep laughing, just tell them "Pinata". (don't believe this one).
Don't take Engineers! It is OK to buy some of the models to paint, but under any circumstance; never, never buy the robohorse. We don't want to encourage their stupidity.
Do not take Karl-Franz on a Dragon. What the hell is wrong with you?
Do put characters with Hatred in units of Halberdiers, Knights, and Greatswords. (actually, just stick to knights).
Do use detachments of missile troops to defend your War Machines.
Do explain to your shocked opponent that Pistols ignore most To-Hit penalties when shooting.
Do learn to guess ranges accurately with your artillery no matter how much practice is required.
Do hope for GW to re-include Imperial Dwarfs, Halflings and the like in our next edition.
Do not think your Steam Tank is invincible. It isn't - not by a long shot.
Do experiment to see which Colors Of Magic are right for you. Some armies depend on Grey Magic, mine would never use Grey. Some people find Jade excellent and others swear by Amber. Also, do hate random spell generation.
Do know that every other army is either bigger, tougher, stronger or scarier than yours. Or any combination thereof.
Do not take the following Magic Items - Gilded Armour, Bronze Shield, Jade Amulet, Crystal Ball (noted above)
Do your math before you charge or take a charge.
Don't assume your enemy will do something stupid.
Do abuse him if he does.
Do have a plan for dealing with big nasties.
Don't be afraid to fight without the "must have" unit.
Do try something just because you like it.
Don't sit your army on a tippy table or chair, no matter how careful you are and how quickly you plan on moving it.
Do reroll all cocked dice even if they are cocked just a tiny bit and it's a good roll.
Do take Halbediers as parent units, they are the fluffiest choice (Don't! Madness!).
Do use a General of the Empire, he is the fluffiest choice (Don't!)
Do paint your bases Goblin Green, its just pure old-school (and looks like cat vomit. From a very sick cat. Possible a cat that has just seen the new Empire book).
Do take musicians.
Do have 5 rank infantry blocks.
Do not feel down when you lose your first few games before you realize what the heck you're doing.
Do choose a lore based on the lowest casting value spell (for your L2 Wizard).
Do give fast cavalry a musician.
Don't take a standard on a unit unless it is ranked infantry or a hammer unit.
Don't charge on the first turn (unless you can!).
Don't take a gunline (unless you hate all good-hearted children, and enjoy kicking puppies in the jaw).
Do always take at least one infantry unit (to make it look like you care about fluff).
Do always take at least one cavalry unit.
Do always take at least one artillery piece.
Don't take the following Magic Items:
- Wyrmslayer Sword
- Gilded Armour
- Bronze Shield
- Jade Amulet
- Talisman of Protection
- Crystal Ball
Don't take Halberdiers as parents (detachments are ok...)
Don't take units of Archers or Free Company (detachments are good...)
Don't take an Engineer. If you do, don't take the Robohorse.
Do assign task for your units. Before the battle starts think about what you want to achieve with a unit ( I often see new players that have some units wander around because they donīt really know what to do with them).
Do try to figure out the plan of your opponent.
Do read the Detachment Tactica of the Reman Legion so you will know how to use archer screens to full effect.
Do take a pair of artillery. Two great cannons perform overall not only twice as well as a single piece because you can cover a greater area with their threat.
Don't leave your soldiers alone and ride of with your General: those guys need his leadership.
Do paint your army to a standard that dazzles your opponent and makes him/her feel badly about their painting skills. After all, humans don't fight very well, so they better at least look good.
Don't play with unpainted models! You might as well play a board game or Risk. Though depending on the composition of your opponent's army, that may still be the better option.
Do mercilessly crush anyone who plays with unpainted models.
Do bring a pot of paint to every game and dip any unpainted models in it.
Do get your main infantry blocks into combat supported by their detachments.
Don't ever say, "I wound on anything but a one."
Do use the General of the Empire, he's cheap but not "cheap and tacky" like those arch lectors (also, his 'magic banner' ability is now useless, thanks to You Know Who).
Do use Inner Circle knights: what's not to like about crazy strong knights?
Do vary magic use: it's boring going against fire lore in every game, [previously heavens then life so this trend will keep evolving no doubt]
Don't expect our characters to win in challenges, apart from the aid of Van Horstman, who was a great chap who invented perhaps the finest item to defeat him with.
Don't expect detachments to do anything. Ever. That way you wont be disappointed when they die game, after game, after game.
Don't field a gunline. Its bad form and it encourages GW to ruin our shooting units for 8th Edition.
Don't give the handgunners a standard.
Don't forget the horsie attacks, since they are always much better at fighting than anything else.
Don't spell War altar with an e. Seriously.
Don't forget that stubborn doesn't mean they wont be running.
Don't try to make sure you at least get a hill (how?).
Do wash and use deoderant before playing in a shop, For one day a woman may come in (someone's mum, most likely).
Don't buy one dwarf slayer model, paint his hair and beard pink, and let him head up your flagellant unit as the "Pink Prophet of Doom."
Don't let your metal retractable tape measure shoot back into its holder whilst your fingers are in the way, the blood will stain the gaming boards.
Do not rub your eyes whilst supergluing models.
Do take a few snacks when planning a big game, but don't take sticky sweets, for then I will have to punch you when you touch my painted figures.
Don't ever use my dice, for they are truly awful.
Don't keep placing terrain down after the wood elf player has placed a wood. Seven woods, seven hills and then an extra wood do not make for a good game for shooty dwarfs.
Do wash your models with soap and water and dry them thoroughly before putting them together - that will save you a ton of pain.
Don't pick on your opponent's lack of painting ability - at least they are playing.
Do have fun.
Do vary wizard choice dependant on army selection. I personally like light, fire and metal, but I consider what lore I'm taking when I plan the list, as to best round out my army.
Do put your foot characters (and mounted Characters for that matter) in units - but keep it in mind that they don't have to stay there.
Do make sure you've brought everything you need to the game; templates, dice, BRB, army book, your list, even a calculator.
Do remember - it's only a game! (only a game! What nonsense!)
Don't say "Anything but a one", ever. Instead say "Anything but a five!!" in your most pleading voice. The dice gods will fall for it. On a more serious note: I really mean this! The most people that moan about always rolling the one when they need to make a 2+ test fall into the old self fulfilling prophecy trap: If the roll is a 2+, they feel like they dodged the bullet and forget about it, but the 16% of rolls that do come up as a one lead to such amount of drama that over time a myth is born: It's always the one.
If you do this with a five, it will totally not change your luck with 2+ rolls, but you will soon feel very lucky indeed and catch yourself saying things like "My, my, it's the big ol' five again. I think your giant is dead!"
Don't let yourself be enraged by bad luck. It's a game. I know the last sentence did not help, but this will, a quote from a man I truly respect, with a deep insight into Warhammer and a tactical mind that never fails to... alright, it's just me, but nevertheless:
Do lose like a man (or a woman, as appropriate. You choose). I know people that become extremely tight lipped when they start to lose. It not only ruins their game, but you are almost afraid to succeed further for fear of hurting their feelings or losing friends / spoiling the evening etc. This gets even crazier than that: I witnessed opponents that were clearly winning but got miffed about loosing a unit of light cavalry in the process that they didn't plan on losing. Listen to this: Measure the quality of a general based in equal parts on his tactical ability as well as the way he carries himself during the game.
Did you watch '300'? Did you see one spartan go "Oh man, we are only 300 and they have a friggin' rhinoceros, and WHOA, they got Tim, now we're only 299, and I don't even have body armour besides this silly cape, this sucks, I don't wanna play anymore, I'm going home, next time we'll bring two steam tanks, I swear!" By the manner of our death shall they recognize us, baby!
If you mastered losing, only then you can enjoy winning. DO win like a man, for once you can accept defeat, you will truly be worthy of victory. See the sig saying "Do not gloat when your enemy falls, etc..." Who was that again? I will now continue with my next point before I sound even more like a space marine...
If you go to tournaments, DO prepare like for a marathon. Sleep enough, I did not enjoy getting up at 5am to watch the sun go up and assemble the last few outriders. Concentration will suffer. Eat enough, but not too much. Bring dextrose and water, pee between games (not at the gaming table). Otherwise concentration will again suffer.
Do take the Warbanner. The best 25 points you can spend.
Do take some form of magic defence. At least 6 dispel dice (A dispel scroll counts as 2 dice) are essential.
Don't expect your shooting to win games. Your guns can weaken high priority targets, but your regiments will do all of the actual fighting.
Don't expose pistoliers to unnecessary harm. When in doubt, hide them from the enemy's guns rather than place them in the line of fire. They'll do more if they're a potential threat than they will if they're dead.
Don't waste your time posting on the forum and reading stupid lists! Go play the game! Or better yet, go out and get some fresh air!
