Warhammer-Empire.com

Tweet

Eater and Drinker

A folk tale of Talabecland


Talabecland is an eerie place of heavy forest and unfriendly settlements. There are many terrible - and beautiful - things that lurk in those forests, and any journey is inevitably slow and fraught with peril. Talabecland has the distinction of being the province that has spent the most time outside the greater Empire, since it maintained complete independence from 1360 until eventual re-unification under Magnus the Pious. In many ways Talabecland is still a place apart: a foreign land at the heart of our most glorious Empire.

The stories of this land are strange and phantasmagorical, filled with magic and mystery. Women often play a much larger role than is typical, since Talabecland has something of a bias towards female rule, dating back to Countess Otillia herself. Sigmar is seldom mentioned. Lest we forget, thousands of His loyal servants were murdered by the soldiers of the Otillias during the long years of the heresy, and their blood stains the soil to this day. - JWG


Once there was a little girl named Liessl, who lived in a tiny village in the forest miles from anywhere. Now Liessl was a hard-working girl who worshipped the gods with diligence, and her parents loved her very much. But one day, the soldiers of the Otillia came to the village, and they took Liessl away with them[1]. And though she wept and cried out to her parents, they were powerless to help her, and fell to weeping themselves.

All day the soldiers marched through the thick forest, until Liessl thought she would fall asleep as she walked. But at length they made camp, and as soon as she was alone Liessl prayed as hard and as long as she could, that she might be delivered from her plight.

All at once, the goddess Rhya came to Liessl in a shower of beech leaves. 'Do not cry, my daughter,' the goddess said, 'for you will soon be returned to your parents, who love you more than the sun in the sky or the ground under their feet. The way ahead will be hard, but I will send two of my servants to watch over you, and help you when they can. Their names are Eater and Drinker, and they are very strange to look upon. Yet you should not fear them, for their hearts are pure as oak and golden with honey.'

Liessl thanked the goddess as best she could. Then the beech leaves turned brown and were blown away as if by an autumn wind, and in their place stood the two spirits, Eater and Drinker.

Eater was tall, taller than the tallest man, but no man was he. Eater had eight long legs like a spider, and a chubby little body that looked like a boar's - but his mouth was huge, and could grow in size so that it was big enough to swallow anything. He scuttled around on his stilt-legs, graceful and swift.

Drinker was short and fat, with the tail of a slug and three small arms like ivy branches. Drinker dripped with water, but was always thirsty. He had a long nose that he could use to reach out to a nearby well or pond, and then drink it all away to nothing.

Now, Liessl was quite taken aback by the sight of these creatures, as indeed anyone would be[2]. But she remembered what the goddess had told her, and so she curtsied to the two spirits, and introduced herself politely. The two spirits bowed to her in return.

Drinker spoke first, in a voice slick as rendered fat, 'Good evening to you Liessl. These are evil men, to take a child from her home in such a way. We will set you free and see you home: let the Otillia wail and gnash her teeth in frustration!'

Eater spoke next, his voice rattling with falling acorns and singing with the hum of bees, 'Though we can take you from the camp and into the forest, we cannot lead you all the way. You must go alone, with wild beasts before you and soldiers coming after.'

'You may call upon each of us once,' said Drinker, 'and then both of us together. We will appear and aid you in what manner our natures allow.'
'Only remember your faith in the gods,' said Eater, 'and the love of your parents. Those things are stronger than anger and better than fear.'

And so it was that the spirits whisked Liessl into the forest but a little way, and showed her the direction she must travel. She thanked them earnestly, and when they had vanished again into the darkness she set off on her long and difficult journey.

It was dark as death in the forest, and Liessl felt leaves brush her face and thorns snag her dress as she went along. Wolves howled in the distance. But she thought of her mother's smiling face, and her father's strong arms lifting her up, and on she went.

After a time, Liessl came to a clearing, where the moonlight showed her the road she had travelled along with the soldiers earlier that day. Now, in the distance she could hear the rumble of hooves, and see the guttering light of torches, for the soldiers had discovered that she was gone and were in pursuit. Liessl raced across the clearing, but found her way on into the forest blocked by thick and impenetrable thorn bushes.

For a moment, Liessl despaired. But then she remembered the spirits' words, and she whispered, 'Come to me, Eater, and aid me please!'

All at once, Eater appeared. Without wasting word or glance, he opened his mouth very wide and ran into the thorn bushes. Up and down went his great jaws, tearing through the bushes like a goat through a flower garden, so that there was soon a path wide enough for Liessl to pass. Once she was safely though the bushes and away from the road, she thanked Eater and kissed him on one of his spindly legs. He bowed so low that his chin touched the ground, and then he was gone.

On went Liessl, for many long and terrifying hours. She passed trees that reared up like dreadful beasts, and trees that sighed and bent like old men. Birds cawed at her reproachfully, and once a huge black bear growled and clawed the bark of a tree in warning. On went Liessl, until at last she came to a deep and fast-flowing river that stood in her path.

For a moment, Liessl despaired. But then she remembered the spirits' words, and she whispered, 'Come to me, Drinker, and aid me please!'

All at once, Drinker appeared. He stuck his long nose into the river, and began to drink up the water. He swelled up as he did so, and by the time the river was low enough to cross he was many times as big as he had been before. Liessl thanked Drinker and kissed him on his slimy skin, then she ran across the river and continued on her way.

Dawn was rising up over the trees when Liessl came in sight of her village once more. But there were the soldiers, lying in wait with their arrows knocked to their bows and their axes sharpened. They snarled when they saw her, and began to advance.

Now, Liessl knew what to do. In a loud voice, she called out, 'Eater and Drinker, come to me! In the name of the gods, help me please!'

And sure enough the spirits appeared. Eater reared up on his washing-pole legs, higher and higher until he towered over the soldiers. Then he opened his mouth and belched, and out came all the thorns he had swallowed earlier. The thorns were like arrows shot from a thousand bows all at once, stabbing at the soldiers all over until they threw themselves onto the ground for protection.

Now Drinker lifted his nose, spraying out the river water in a great torrent. So swift and violent was the water that the soldiers were simply washed away, never to trouble Liessl or her village again.

Liessl thanked Eater and Drinker once again. She offered to take them to her home, that her parent might reward them, but they declined. 'You are safe now, Liessl,' said the spirits, 'live well and be happy: but do not forget us!'

So Eater and Drinker disappeared for the last time, and Liessl went into the village and was reunited with her loving parents. But she never forgot the two spirits; and when she was a grown woman she built a shrine to their memory, which can still be seen to this day.



[1]Interestingly, no mention is made of why the soldiers should be abducting children in this fashion - presumably, this would once have been common knowledge. I suspect that the Otillia in question may have been the insane Countess Ermingard, an infamous murderer of innocents who reigned from 1417-1433. The Countess is believed to have ordered the deaths of some two hundred children, but was eventually pushed from a window by one potential victim. Ermingard landed and was impaled on the palace railings, where her body was simply left to rot, so hated was she.

[2]The bizarre and even nightmarish appearance of the two spirits is not unusual in stories from Talabecland. Many times, it is the villains that appear as beautiful to look upon, while the forces of good wear the mask of horror.