Kaptain Blacksquig adjusted the range of his spyglass with a gentle twist. The Dwarven fleet jumped into view, strung out in a long line across the treacherous waters of the swiftly flowing River Kaltfluss. He could easily make out the giant shape of an Ironclad and several Monitors moving upriver at full steam, great clouds of smoke trailing behind them. Last evenings previous storms had faded just after dawn, the winds diminished now to a strong breeze that carried the telltale stench of coal boilers across the deck of the Blacksquig. The Orcs were sitting idel in the cold waters, waiting to catch the wind if it shifted. The Kaltfluss estuary here was perhaps three miles wide, with sweeping bends and forest covered islands that could hide enemies from view. The Orc naval base, Port Maw, was located further upriver, and the Kaptain was keenly aware that his fleet was the first line of defense against any river borne attacks.
Pausing for a moment to empty his stomach of its contents over the side of the forecastle , Blacksquig sucked in great gulping breaths of air while steadying his legs. He decided he shouldnt have had that final helping of Elvenstew. He knew better than to eat something his sailors used daily in lubricating the cannon greives! ! But his guests last night, Warboss BroadPaunch of Da Irongnashaz clan and his Big Un's, had insisted on a grand feast and an all night bout of drinking until the wee hours. But the Boss's orderz were made clear as well...
“All right, ya zoggin gits! Shod up! All ov ya! Iz ben hearin dat dem zogging stunties and 'umies iz comin up da road an river fer uz. Dey iz sittin at da Tower right now, and soon dey’ll be marhin nort. So, itz up ta uz ta smash em before dey git ere! Git yer boyz an head south ta krump dem. Make sure der zoggin ships dont make it to da Port!" So the Blacksquig had set sail at dawn, floating downriver to intercept the Dwarven vanguard.
"Sumfink up Boss?" queried One Eyed Badtoof, one of his mates, who to the constant aggravation of Blacksquig, had found his sealegs as soon as the galleon took to the waters. So much so that Blacksquig spun round and delivered an iron-shod headbutt that left Skrunch sliding down the bulkhead in a semi coma. Adjusting his great black Kaptain's hat to the correct angel, jaunty was the word he liked to use, Blacksquig turned to the assembled crew.
"Not at all Badtoof, not at all. Listen up gitz! We gotz kompany. Bandits. Stunties. Der, der, der, and der. Coming in from da sun and wif da wind. Weze got orderz to stop em, and stop em ded! So dat is wot weze is gonna do. Yose uuver Kaptains, I wantz yose to spread out and wait fer da wind, trim yer sails and use yer oarz to hold here. I wantz dem Stunties to 'ave to come to us. Den weze can open up wif da kannons and send dem Stunties to sleep wif der fishes. Weze is Orcs, aint we? And we dont lose. Not to da Stunties! Not ever! Waaaaaaaaaaagh!"
A sea of upraised arms were lifted in unison, weapons thrust high and animalistic yells and bellows lifted in fellwoship.
"Def to da Stunties. Curse der ironboats! Burn der beards! Boil der fatz! Let da iron of der ships fill der pants and drag em down into da depths! Waaaaaaaaagh!"
Satisfied that his troops were motivated, Blacksquig felt a tug at his greatcoat. Looking down he saw his kabingrot Slapnutz pulling on the hem and pointing starboard. Glancing in that direction, Blacksquig saw one of the Orc sloops, Gork's Pride, leaving the armada and moving swiftly towards the Dwarven ships.
"A pox on you Ugbaz!", shouted Blacksquig. "Yose aint followin da plan again!"
Kaptain Ugbaz, pilot of the Gork's Pride, had a nasty reputation for being foolhardy and reckless. Mountains of teef were needed every time the fleet went to battle, mostly to repair Gork's Pride. Ugbaz was always taking chances with his refitted Bretonnian Buccaneer, always the first to reach the enemy and always getting the ship blasted to bitz. Metal patches adorned the craft, and it sported a large ironshod ram fashioned in the likeness of a leering Orc face. And his crew was just as reckless and they most certainly enjoyed some sort of bleesing from Gork, as the ship always made it through the scarp, though rarely in one piece. Ugbaz could be seen grinning manically back at Blacksquig, all sanity gone from his face as his ship sped downstream. All on deck of Grok's Pride were reading kannon and boarding planks, intent on hitting the Stunties head-on. The other ships of the fleet cheered Gork's Pride while its crew jeered back at them!
Several Monitors took up point in front of the Ironclad, moving to intercept the crazed Orc craft. Turrets ground into firing postions and deckguns were unfurled from their leather sheaths. Soon enough, the morning air was split by the roar of cannon fire. Shots hit the water in fron of Gork's Pride as she tacked back and forth to avoid the incoming shots. A massive cannonball hit the prow of the ship, denting the ram and breaking off one of its ears. Several more hit the ram and bounced off, sending balls rolling across the deck. Many Orcs were bowled over as the balls rolled through their ranks, some losing legs, some other more needed appendages. A direct hit smashed into the main mast and splintered wood onto the poopdeck, causing several Goblins to scatter for cover. A sickening groan of wood accompanied the hit, and the mast was starting to sway as the weigh of sails started to pull it down. Orcs scrambled forwards to try and brace the mast with wooden beams, barrels and even Goblins!
" Fire da zoggin Bombard!!!!!", barked Ugbaz, ducking for cover behind the wheel as another cannonball hit the water to port and exploded. "Fire da zoggin fing now!" The near miss forced the ship to starboard and it almost rolled over before righting itself. Even as it did, the Orc ship was bracketed by more cannon fire, with shots hitting the water to both sides and throwing chilled water onto the decks. Small fires strated as tapers and braizers spilled due to the violent rocking of the ship.
Then a vast explosion erupted from the forecastle of Gork's Pride as the looted Imperial bombard fired towards the stunty vessels. The gigantic ball travelled in a sharp arc, falling from the sky and striking the lead Monitor below the waterline. The ensuing explosion blocked out sight of the ship as gouts of water were blasted high into the air following the direct hit. The shearing sound of metal was soon accompanied by groaning sounds as bulkheads collapsed and the Dwarf ship took on water through the gaping whole below her waterline. Secondary explosions erupted from here portholes as powder stores blew and the ship listed to port, rapidly sinking into the Kaltfluss.
Cheers went up from Gork's Pride as the Orc weapon had found its mark. The crew moved with all speed to roll the broadside kannons back into position before the stunties ships got too close.
Another bracket of cannon fire hit the midships at that point, pinwheeling Orcs and Goblins high into the air and destroying several of the kannons. With a final groan of protest, the main mast finally collasped under another hit and it pitched downwards onto the main deck. Orcs scrambled to get out of the way as two tons of wood and sail smashed onto the wooden deck. Many greenskins could not get out of the way and were pulped, while others were forced overboard to save themselves. Gork's Pride pitched quickly to port and started to spin out of control in the swift current, even as she began to take on water through a hole in the bottom of the ship. A large, pointed peice of the mast had speared through the maindeck and peirced the bottom of the ship. The doomed vessel still swept downstream, right towards the guns of the Dwarf fleet!
From under a pile of sails, Kaptain Uzbag extracated himself from the heavy cloth and looked about. His sails were gone, many of his crew were dead or dying and he was taking on water. Fires were burning all across the ship, billowing smoke drifting back into his blackened face. The acrid smoke casued his eyes to water and he angrily swiped the water from his face with the back of his hand.
"Nufink new", he shouted. "Weze got dem Stunties roit where we wants em! Da ship is still floating and da kannons are ready to fire. Ladz, prepare fer boarding!"