BRB p. 78: "This might result in both sides having charging units in the same fight, in which case the charging units on both sides will get the normal bonuses conferred by charging (e.g. causing impact hits, benefiting from a lance's Strength bonus, etc., and other bonuses described later in this Rules section). Also, both sides will get the +1 combat resolution bonus, which will effectively cancel each other out."
There is no specification that the charge boni are only effective against the unit charged. Therefore only 1) is correct.